How to Tell Your Mom You Got Your Period (Even If You Are Nervous)

This week, so many girls told Soso the same thing: "I got my period, or I think I am about to, and I am nervous to tell my mom." Some of you asked for the exact words to use. Some even asked how to say it by text. If that sounds like you, take a breath. This is one of the most common feelings in the world, and telling her is usually so much easier than it feels right now.

Why it feels so big

Telling someone you got your period can feel huge, even when your mom is lovely and you talk about everything. It might feel private, or grown-up, or just a little embarrassing. All of that is normal. Naming the feeling, even just thinking "I am nervous," already makes it smaller.

Here is something most girls do not realize: your mom went through this exact moment too. She remembers being your age. There is a very good chance she has been quietly hoping you will feel comfortable telling her.

The good news

Most moms react with love, not fuss. Many feel happy, even a little proud, that you trusted them. The conversation is almost always shorter and warmer than the worry you build up beforehand. Once it is out, most girls feel a big wave of relief.

Find the way that feels right for you

There is no single correct way to tell her. Pick whatever feels easiest:

• Just say it. Simple and quick. It is over in seconds.
• Tell her by text. Lots of you asked about this, and it is a great option when saying it out loud feels too hard.
• Write her a note and leave it where she will find it.
• Show her instead of saying it. Ask her to help you find pads, or just say "I need supplies."
• Use a code word you agree on ahead of time, like "the package arrived."

Exact words you can use

If you are not sure how to start, borrow one of these.

Out loud:

• "Mom, I think I got my period."
• "Hey, can we talk for a sec? I started my period today."
• "I need your help with something. I got my period and I am not sure what to do."

By text:

• "Mom, I got my period today, can you help me when you get home?"
• "Hi mom, I think it started. Can we get some pads?"
• "I have something to tell you but it is easier to type it: I got my period."

There is no wrong way to say it. Even "ummm, so, it happened" works perfectly.

If you are scared, or you do not usually talk about this stuff

If your family does not talk about periods much, it can feel extra awkward, and that is okay. A few things that help:

• Pick a calm, private moment, like in the car or at bedtime, not in front of other people.
• Lead with what you need. "I need some supplies" gives her something to do, which makes it easier for both of you.
• Remember you do not have to explain everything. "I got my period" is a complete sentence.

If you are scared about the period itself, not just telling her, that is worth sharing too. Saying "I am a little scared" gives her the chance to reassure you, which is exactly what moms are for.

What if I cannot tell my mom?

Some girls do not have a mom to tell, or do not feel comfortable telling a parent. That is completely okay, and you still deserve support. You can talk to any trusted adult:

• A dad, grandma, aunt, or older sister or cousin.
• A school nurse or counselor. They help with this all the time, and it stays private.
• A teacher you trust, or a friend's mom.

You are never the only person who has been through this, and there is always someone who can help you get what you need.

After you tell her

Once it is out, the next steps are usually simple: getting supplies, maybe a quick chat about how to use them, and knowing she is in your corner. Many girls say the hardest part was the few minutes before they spoke, and the relief afterward was huge.

Whenever you are ready, you have got this. And if you want help figuring out what to say, or just want to understand what is happening with your body, you can ask Soso anytime in the app.